Today’s mental image of the day comes from MonkeyBagel in his ode to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy: "… a whimpering mime curled into a fetal ball, corndogs smacking wetly into his head …" Mmmm…. corndogs.

Harrold’s Angels Sing opens tonight and runs through Sunday at the Town and Gown theater. In this image from the poster, I’ve been turned into a cute little cherub, lecherously peeking down the beauty’s toga. That describes my character pretty well, really. You can click on the picture for a larger version. For those of you reading this in Athens, the show’s at 8:15 tonight and tomorrow, 2:15 on Sunday. $5 to get in, or $4 if you’re a student. You spynotebook folks might enjoy this one. And hey, it’s all happening right next door to Chip’s place.

At my new house, I’ve got the dish network (America’s Top 100), but I really haven’t had the time to explore the channels. Last night as I was falling asleep I found Noggin, a channel of educational children’s programming with a focus on such “retro” shows as 3-2-1 Contact (Wherever there’s trouble, we’re there on the double. We’re the Bloodhound Gang! If you’ve got the crime, we’ve got the time. We’re the Bloodhound Gang!), The Electric Company (Hey You Guys!), and ’60s and ’70s Sesame Street. It had been at least 20 years since I’d seen The Electric Company. The channel is clearly targeted at people of my age group with young uns of their own. In place of commercials, they run little clips of animation, quick fun facts, and lots of retro TV moments. Each week the website has three retro clips that you can vote on for your favorite. This week, choose between Jennifer of the Jungle teaches the ape about quotation marks, Sing a Song, and the Bert & Ernie classic Bannana in Ear. I’m as much for Jennifer of the Jungle as the next guy, but when you’re up against Bannana in Ear, there’s just not much that can be done. Last week’s winner: The Mad Painter ("Today, I’m going to paint a four “). I don’t know why this appeals to me so. It’s especially puzzling since my family didn’t have a TV for much of my childhood.

After mentioning retro educational TV this morning, Marjorie asked me about Zoom. I never saw Zoom myself, and everytime I hear it mentioned, it’s in the context of “I used to love Zoom, but everyone I talk to thinks I’m crazy, that I’m making it up. " Zoom’s not on Noggin, but you can read all about it, see photos from the show, and even look at original Zoom mailings at TV Party’s Lost Kid Show’s pages. PBS is now running a hip modern revival of the show, and like all PBS programs, they’ve got a mighty complete internet presence.

Back on the 28th of January, I commented on the strange story of a murdered English chicken. CNN has just now picked up on the story (oh yeah… I scooped CNN by 21 days!). They’ve added a few details, like the fact that the chicken used to perch up in a local tavern and relieve itself wherever it pleased.

Sometimes (like here in my office), I don’t have the space to roll out the full-sized Twister mat. At times like that, I turn to Finger Twister.

Please help Billy Evans (the boy with just a head, and a burlap sack for a body). Every nickle from Bill Gates and AOL is a prayer from NASA, and Billy needs our help.

I have had The Grand Old Duke of York (…he had ten thousand men…) running through my head for three days straight now. Someone, anyone, please make it stop!

I got my tax refund back yesterday. It only took 18 days, which I think is a speed record for me. It came in a brown envelope with a hole cut in it so my mailing address printed right on the check could be clearly seen. The hole was big enough that anyone could see without any doubt that the envelope did indeed contain a check for nearly $900. The back of the envelope had this nifty message: “Thank you for filing your income tax return. Use direct deposit to have your refund deposited directly into your bank account. Just fill out the direct deposit portion on your tax form.” There are so many things wrong with this – True, I’ve already filed my taxes. You’re welcome. But, the envelope was specially designed to hold checks and in fact contains my refund. It’s too late to choose direct deposit, no? And anyway, as you’ve already pointed out way back in sentence one, I’ve already filed my tax forms, so I couldn’t fill out the direct deposit section anyway, even if I wasn’t already holding the check in my hands, right?

Maybe it’s their terribly clever way to confuse would-be mail theives. “Woo hoo! I scored someone’s tax check! I can see it through the hole, clear as day. Wait, what’s this on the back… Choose direct deposit? Huh? Maybe that’s not a $900 check I see in there. I guess it’s just a, um, a receipt. Damn! "

Anyway, now that the money’s safely in my bank account, I can actually order those seeds and start playing in the dirt.

From Backup Brain comes a study on the quantum effects of a can of ravioli, specifically what would happen if the can were shot at relativistic speeds at a large star cruiser. Stand back: “Thermonuclear interactions, such as hydrogen fusion, may take place in the tomato sauce… "